12 CRIME TURN UP YOUR MANNERS Our top crime this month? Noise violations. Yes, folks, it seems that Isle of Palms residents have a very loose definition of "quiet hours." The biggest offenders? Beachgoers who confused their vacation rental with a music festival and one unfortunate retiree who just really enjoys his classic rock at full volume. Officers reminded citizens that while Jimmy Buffett is eternal, your neighbor’s patience is not. IT’S ORGANIC AND ILLEGAL Several individuals were caught with small amounts of marijuana and in one case, an offender tried to claim his baggie of greenery was actually "oregano for his grandma’s spaghetti." Nice try, buddy… Arrivederci. FUELED BY FOOLISHNESS In a stunning revelation, multiple individuals discovered that, yes, driving does require a valid license. And insurance. And sobriety. Not to be outdone, one driver managed to be both uninsured and under the influence — truly a multi-tasker. BITE CLUB Two separate dog bite incidents were reported, leading some to wonder if the local pups have formed an underground fight club. First rule of Bite Club: Don’t talk about Bite Club. PARTY POLITELY OR INVITE YOUR NEIGHBORS The following incidents were obtained from the Isle of Palms Police Department Media Log Reports. This is a parody of real criminal events that occurred between February and March. The names of individuals and business locations have been omitted out of privacy and respect. Welcome back to another installment of "Who's Causing a Ruckus on the Island?” your premier guide to what not to do in public. Stay safe, stay quiet and for heaven’s sake — get your driver’s license! POLICE BLOTTER IslandVibesIOP.com
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